Q: I am constantly living in the past, thinking of all the events and people who hurt me, how I was manipulated and this negativity of the mind stops me from being present. How do I free myself from this past?
M: There is no past nor future. There is only ‘Now.’ Past is the result of memory, which although useful for survival of the body-mind mechanism, does not serve you in your journey to seek the truth. Inquire into your memory and check if it is for real. If you lost all your memory today, where will all the past be?
What cannot ever be lost is the truth, rest is all false. Now check, is memory true or false? And if it is false, why bother? Realise without doubt that your memory is only an illusion, completely fake. It is only useful for the illusory body and mind mechanism, which you are not. Knowing this, be free from the past. All events in the memory are fake, people are fake, hurts are fake, manipulation is fake, your constant dwelling into this fake memory is also fake.
Q: But the memory is so strong it seems very real. I am unable to see it as fake. What should I do?
M: Go to your Guru. Ignorance is very strong here, only Guru will advise what practice would be right for you. When a patient has high fever and the tongue finds sweets to be bitter, it is the doctor who will test and give appropriate medicine.
Q: I do not have a Guru. Can I do some meditation?
M: Which meditation will you do? Maybe you will learn something from YouTube or read a book and try something, and feel relaxed for a little time. That will not cure your ignorance. Temporary relief from a disturbed mind is not the cure.
Taking on a spiritual path and journey without a Guru will take you nowhere.
Sinful Actions
Q: What are sinful actions? How can I avoid committing sins?
M: Actions/thoughts and behaviours that lead to bondage and suffering are sinful actions. Identification with your memory is the root cause of all sin. Now check what all is in your memory. All that you think of yourself as you- your name, family, nationality, religion, education, profession, desires, likes, dislikes, values- these are all in your memory. You are strongly identified with all of these and actions that arise from these identifications create bondage, thus acts of sin.
Q: Can you share an example?
M: You eat a certain kind of food because you are tempted, but that does not suit your body and leads to disease/discomfort, so eating that food was a sin. You say bitter words to someone because you have a different perspective, and are later filled with guilt, then saying those bitter words was an act of sin. Now if we look closely, if these acts came from certain identification with likes-dislikes, values and so on, these would lead to suffering. But the same act could have also come out of compassion. Compassion does not come from memory. It is the result of total disidentification with the memory. For example, when Buddha ate poisonous food out of compassion for a devotee, it did not cause him suffering. When a Teacher points out weaknesses in the student, sometimes using bitter words, then it does not cause suffering.
Realise your true nature. You are not the memory. Memory is a useful tool to help in the survival of this organism and to live a useful life. Beyond that memory is your biggest enemy. Just like fire is a useful slave but a destructive master.